Reviews by The Mighty Celestial

Growing up, it always frustrated me whenever the majority of big budget action flicks or martial arts movies of the time often seemed to sacrifice on story to make room for the expansive bangs & the expensive effects. It was generally said, that in these types of movies, you couldn't really have both, particularly, at a consistent high level. And I was one those kids who always asked "Why not?"
And then came the House Of Flying Daggers. And with it's beautiful story of love & intrigue, combined with lavish costumes, solid performances & unique individually themed action sequences, this film of the burgeoning genre known as wuxia, seemed to asked that very same question.
An action flick that not only raises the adreline, but also leaves the senses enriched.

A film also known as Belleville Rendez-vous, depending on what part of the world you view this movie from.
Speaking as someone who has worked the majority of his life as an illustrator & cartoonist, I was surprised at how close this flick was to the specific style of drawing that got me interested in the field to begin with. Gritty yet beautifully rendered, cartoonishly exaggerated yet realistically animated. I could look at artwork like this all day.
Plus, even though it is a foreign film, it has no dialogue in it, at all. And therefore, no need for sub-titles. So if some bizarre accident occurs (heaven forbid, of course) whereby that part of your brain that's responsible for reading becomes inexplicably cancelled out, you'll still be able to watch & enjoy this flick.

Take what Cloverfield took from The Blair Witch Project, add a dash of 28 Days Later, and then sprinkle on some sub-titles (at least, in my case),
& there you go. A quality zombie flick of which I rarely get to see without a giant glob of gooey camp splattered all over it.

Some of the most breathtaking & gorgeously intricate background set designs ever in a film. So rich are the colors & exquisite details in this movie, that it requires multiple viewings just to be able to soak it all in. Once one can get passed that aspect of the film, it will become obvious that the sets are not a distraction, but an enhancement to the story. An enrichment that adds to the dialogue with an intensity that allows the ideas of what appears to be human pettiness behavior in a royal setting to be revealed as much grander in scope & concept.
And for a movie that can make someone as simple minded as myself come to a conclusion like that, that's definitely a statement to the power of it's artistry.

Because of the severe financial restraints of this picture, the story is forced to be told thru the creativity of all-out action in it's purest, unadulterated form. I think that there should be a law requiring that all big budget action films be shot & directed with as much energy & fun as in this one, before even one cent of the million dollars of special effects is spent.
Cool, violent & high-octane action-adventure in all it's bared-boned glory.

Good horror movies come so rarely into my life. The same with good vampire movies. And the same also goes for good love stories (I refrain from using the term "romance movies" since I find Hollywood's idea of romance is always so impossibly & ridiculously fairy-tale-like). This movie is 2 outta 3 (Though there is some, it's very light on the horror). Told more in an adult manner, yet still with enough of an escapist sensibilty that is respective to the genre, this is a soft, beautiful & beguiling story (which is really saying something since I don't know what that word means) of two 12 year olds finding love for the first time thru the flaws of each of their separate (& sometimes desperate) life situations.
The lead actors for this movie portray their characters with a true down to earth awkwardness that is usually found with kids at this age, along with a longing that is both sincere & convincing.
As far as vampire love stories go, I find myself agreeing with those who compare this one with another human-falls-for-bloodfeeder film that was released around the same time :
the 15 year old girls can have their Twilight. I'll take LTROI.

I like this movie.
That's right.
I said it.

While I initially dimissed this king of kings of all crappy movies because of it's reputation, I have since then actually developed an affection towards this film.
Sure,
it's probably lives up to it's rep as the worst movie ever made,
but it's not without it's charm.
There are plenty of bad movies out there that are just bad & then that's it. No more to add.
But this film,
there's an instinctual level to it,
in which it feels like that there came a day when all the film-gods gathered together & decided to inspire a woman's cashmere sweater wearing b-film (okay, okay.....d-film....& that's being generous) "director" to make a movie that's so bad, it can almost remind us that a big part the concept of filmmaking is to just have fun. To "escape" into the process of making a movie as much as in the viewing.

Okay, maybe not everyone will get any kind of positive response from watching this trainwreck of falling backdrops & bad acting (really bad acting), but you don't even have to watch it. Just knowing that it's there is enough. As a reminder that we can not have a day without a night. We cannot have the good without the bad.
We cannot have an Apocalypse Now without a Plan 9 From Outer Space.
To reminds us just how good movies can be if some of 'em can be this bad.

And to it's credit, considering the time it was made,
some of the effects are kinda amazing.
I mean, I don't know how they did it, but they actually made some of the props in this film look like they were made out of actual cardboard.
And this was before CGI.
Like way before.

I've never really been into romance flicks all that much. The few that I do enjoy usually tend to have a sort of a sharp or jagged edge to 'em. And this one definitely does thru Jack's portrayal of a writer with "redrum" on his mind. At least, he does with the little dog during the opening sequence.
Nicholson eases thru the role of a crusty curmudgeon with psychologically-based anti-social issues ( Is it just me or does it seem that the majority of Jack's most memorable roles always have something seriously askew upstairs? Or am I just being crazy?), & he does so with the insane-like smoothness of an actor who can do this blindfolded.
And the fact that, at the same time, he still manages to allow himself to deliver lines that make the ladies go "aw[Link removed - login to see], therefore, substantially increasing the chances of me "gettin' some" with my date on the night I saw this film, & it becomes easy to see why this is a romantic comedy that provides an end-result that can be pleasing to both males & females alike.

While Tom Cruise's acting is on-spot intensively cocky & Demi Moore's is as noble as is possible for an actress who's mug, on an average day, can only be described as stunning, it is Jack Nicholson's limited on-camera performance that catches the audience's attention & seems to (as usual) carry more weight than that of a few good actors.

Here, he's in a role that plays perfectly to his strengths. A mean ol' sunuvabitch with a focused confidence, a black heart & a wry look that you know he wears wether he's describing a blowjob from a female officer or warding off bullets from Cuban snipers in defense of this great country (and, more importantly, in defense of his military career).
Nicholson does this to such a successful degree, that even though he doesn't really have all that much screentime in this film, the face of Col. Jessup in the witness chair is usually the 1st. image that comes up when this movie is mentioned. And as always, the mark of a great performance is to be able to deliver a line that ends up becoming a part of the culture.
And if you don't agree with that, then there can only be one reason why:
YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!

While Tim Burton's was the first to finally introduce the down to earth grittiness that revealed Batman as the real badass that we who read his comics knew that he really was, there was still a certain flamboyancy ( as is in all of Burton's films) that allowed those filmmakers whose followed in this franchise after Burton, to systematically bring the Caped Crusader down almost to the level of Adam West doing the bat-toosie.



This reboot came along & completely eliminated the almost unrepairable bat-damage still lingering in the minds of general movie-goers.
I remember sitting thru the first scene of this film & thinking to myself that it was hard to believe that what I was watching was actually a superhero movie. I can even overlook the fact that the Bat-Mobile was now more of a massively unbatlike tank/dune-buggy hybrid than it was an actual sleek yet indestructible @ss-kicking ride that we all average joe mortal-types like to fantasize about owning.